The Grateful Dead’s Scarlet Begonias has the line “once in awhile you get shown the light, in the strangest of places if you look it right.”  Over the last years since our son’s death, I have found that to be very true. But, on the flip side, as I have had the incredible joys and excitement over the last month in signing two publishing contracts, I have instead found the opposite of that quote.  In the absolute elation of the signing, and then the fun of the ensuing logistics, I have also found the crushing sadness of our son not being here to be part of the cover conversations, the awkwardness of the author photos, and the silliness of conversations about how to market the books.  It made me realize anew that human emotions don’t follow a logical and rationale path, and so I guess the best I can do is ride the roller coaster, and look for the light where I can.